By nature I will ignore a problem and hope it goes away rather then confront my evils. A repressive personality. So I keep a lot of stuff inside, and eventually after years there's just so much you can take and you start to unwind a bit and let it out. If you are not careful, your anger can become misdirected toward the wrong people.
Lately I've been having serious relationship issues with my wife, and comes a time and Black throated wind also sometimes make me angry. They remind me of shitty things in my life I do not like. But I am obsessed with the music, I actually made a flashdrive full of all the songs that put me in a "dark place", looks like rain, simple twist of fate, forever young (dylans verson) about 30 songs and I would force myself to listen and sometimes I would even cry.. I did add a Going down the road so I could scream "don't want to be treated this a way". To me it was my way of facing my demons. And it worked. you have to walk through hell to get to heaven. I faced my demons, worked through my issues and while it was painful as hell I had to do it and I am glad I did. I never could have done it without the music.
Slowly I worked out of my funk - for the most part, but I am still addicted to the music and now I am fascinated by how deep some of the lyrics are. So I am on my own quest to understand the songs. Looking for lyrics I have heard for years but never really "heard". So I listen more now than ever (plus I just got gd channel in March which is addicting).
But I have gone streatches without listening to the dead so much. I think was trying to expand what music I listened to.
Some songs just sort of annoy me, bombs away, casey jones and truckin are 3 of these. I was surprised that last night on the gd channel they played Scarlet Begonias right after the daily (taped) live show. I think they've been playing Scarlet every night after the live show, and while it's one of my favorite songs, I was tired of it so I said to myself it's time to find Dylans station. That surprised me - but I still love the song.
I don't know if you have any similar issues, but just writing this has helped me a bit...so thank you. And good luck. If you are a fan why worry if you are not in the mood to hear some songs now. Take it all in stride...... One day at a time.
If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it is yours, if it does not, it never was
May God bless and keep you always
May your wishes all come true
May you always do for others
And let others do for you