Just then the doorbell sounds off, and I run to the door and catch myself in our hallway mirror as I slide by. Damn, I'm fine. If I was single I would date myself. Damn! I open the door and the man says package. I said Damn! He says what?! I says Damn that was fast! He says we try! Try ain't the word, damn, that was like instantmatic baby! Well sir if you sign here. I says hell yes I will sign there! I said Damn. Well, sir it was must be a nice order if you're that excited. You damn right. Damn! I just shook my head once more.
I humped that fellow all the way to his truck. I was so excited! Damn!
I ran in and opened the package and it was a freaking book. A book?! I ain't reading no damn book. I want my cd! Who reads in this house?! Who the hell reads in my house?! My family ran up to see what was wrong and my son says that's my book, Dad. Oh we got a reader in the house, do we? Boy, thinks he's Alexander Einstein. Well, Mr. Einstein, read.. read..
Read what? Say what one more freaking time!
We all sat around the fireplace and listened to him read. It was a good story. I fell asleep half way through and when I woke up, I beat his ass.