AcidTestGraduate wrote:


Hey brother thanks. Take care man.

I think there's a solution to this flag madness.

There should be a flag for the hosting city and one for the visitors. The visitors can dress up like native Americans and the host citys people can be dressed like Cowboys. The goal is for the visitors to try and take the host city's flag. When they meet up and the "battle" begins, make a truce and smoke the peace pipe!

AcidTestGraduate wrote:


I don't think that would work for me, since WHEN Furthur has their 3 (or 5 ) night run in Montreal, I will be grately (and gratefully) outnumbered.

I hope they announce that Montreal run with enough time for me to get a passport

jaredlang wrote:



It doesn't matter if you're outnumbered. There's nothing to worry about, once they're upon you you immediately have a truce and smoke the peace pipe.

FurthurFlower67 wrote:

Denver Man, we have no outcasts in our merry little band of pirates. Bill I like u also. You have made every effort to contribute to our forum gatherings in a way positive way. I understand that folks (even Furthur luving folks) may sometimes have dust ups, disagreements even. There is a cool line in a Bonnie Raitt song which is; we can't forget about the past, but we can leave it behind. Sounds like a good idea, no? Even if u 2 don't like each other, u should make peace, cause other wise u will miss out on the best brownies ever. IMHO, it's time to drop this issue, clean the slate and go back to having fun and enjoying each others company.
At work I deal with a lot of sensitive people who always feel like some other person is treating them in a disrespectful fashion. The standard line to these people is that you don't have to like each other, you just have to be able to work together. For all of us in the FFF tent, we can do better than that. We can try to see a little furthur. Did I mention how good the brownies taste?

Next topic; this show in Canada. Perhaps in late spring, summer or early fall. It snowed on the day of the first Phil and Friends show at Wellmont Theater. There were a lot less people there because of the inclement weather, which made for a relaxed place with lots of extra dancing room. Though if it's cold outside, snuggling up and sharing body warmth is a good way to get closer to women, uh I mean create much needed heat. For medicinal purposes only, not to contribute to lust or desire; honest. This approach may need a little fine tuning b4 the Montreal show. Fortunately I have some time to work on this. The Grateful Dead played in Alaska, so I should be able to handle Montreal.

i wasnt going to say anything about this, but i think its now important that i do...

ive known denver man awhile now, he has always been one of the most generous, jovial, and flat out cool people ive known from the FFF. he has been a good friend to both me and my girlfriend, and ive more than enjoyed his company at plenty of shows now. i dont know the specifics here. but this is not a guy who seeks personal vengence, holds grudges, or generally wants to hold onto anything negative at all. i think he is probably getting an unfair shake here as someone who has contributed for a lot longer than a lot of people on here. he is a great dood, and shouldnt be outcast like this. i mean really? lets drop this shit and keep it groovy on here, but if you do check out denver man, i hope we can still kick it at the shows, because this is some bullshit of the highest order...

Lets not to get to bummed when people speak passionately about subjects that are important to them. That's the way life goes and that's also how change happens. If it upsets you so much maybe you could find some other pastime while people try to sort out their differences. Go watch cartoons or stick your head in the sand or something.

It has become apparent that DM has some issues about who carry's the flag. Apparent because he has said on more than one occasion the "the same people always have the flag" Another comment has been that "only local people should have the flag" Both of these statements indicate his unhappiness about his chance to have it. I can appreciate his opinion on this matter. However, instead of trying to work it out and come to a harmonious conclusion with all, he makes simple comments that bring undue negativity into the forum, but won't continue his communication in order to work them out. The lack of communication is the root of the problem. If you have an issue you need to be able to give some examples, offer some suggestions, ask for help in resolving it, you know, work it out. Making one sentence negative comments and them hiding from the issue accomplishes nothing more than creating ongoing negativity, and shows yourself as unwilling to resolve your problem. Just like at RR, where some personal issue arose, and there was no words about it until after the shows and he started complaining about what happened. Nothing. Then a couple of months later the whining about the same people always having the flag starts, and no further explanations as to why he feels this way or how to fix it. Just the whining about it. That's no way to fix it, you have to air it out, you know, get really crazy, talk about it and everything. Try to fix it. Continued one line complaints don't do anything but continue the unnecessary negativity. It just doesn't work. Someone has to bring the issue to light and try to make it better. Not to outcast anyone, (give yourself a minute to figure this out) but to bring us closer and resolve any issues anyone might have. You have to get to the root of the problem, you have to hash it out, you have to try to find a way to fix it. It's not always happy happy love joy, but sometimes that's what it takes.

The whole goal and the way the project was designed was so that we all could share the flag. Everyone equally with equal shares and chance to have it. When someone feels that they have not been treated fairly they need to be able to speak up about it, even if it takes more than one sentence comments. Its your flag as much as anyone esle's but if you're unable to communicate your feelings or unwilling to work out any issues then you're going to have to run around feeling mistreated. But please keep that to yourself. Nobody wants to hear your continued half spoken issues and childish complaints. Thats bullshit pure and simple, and that's why I brought this subject into the light. In essence, speak your mind or please shut up.

I completely agree that it's all about communication, as both DM and Ossumpei have said on this subject at one time or another. Ideally, constructive communication that resolves issue and is respectful of everyone's feelings. If you want the flag, speak up clearly and loudly. If you want to organize a gathering, go for it, just keep everyone in the loop using the board and every other means of communication at your disposal. If you have a problem with a person or process, bring it up kindly, work it out and then drop it. Whether it's a marriage or a friendship or a group, it's never particularly helpful to bring up old problems that can't be undone, unless it's to prevent them from happening again and not just to reopen old wounds. I think this group gets better and better at communicating and coordinating with every show. Let's keep it up, FFF, we've got a good thing going here!

Mark, you're only an outcast if you choose to make yourself one, and I really, really hope you don't do that. I love having you around here, and don't want you to go. It's so easy to carry around hurt and grudges (I'm extremely good at that myself unfortunately), but it's not very productive. So polish up that flag pole, slap on a couple more stickers and let's drag that baby out for a Broomfield run TOGETHER!!

Thanks so much Sue, that's exactly what I'm trying to get across.

Sometimes I can be overly crass and direct, but in this case and every other on this forum, my goal is the harmony we've come to expect and enjoy here.

I wanted to make the point that everyone has the right to share the flag, and if they feel slighted, to air those grievances so we can work them out. One line comments or complaints just don't help that process

Thank you for understanding my point and helping to state it more gracefully than I have.

Sue, you get two brownies here, for making the effort. Bill, uh okay a few minor points. Sarcasm can be both a constructive and effective way to communicate. I agree with Sue, if you want to confront and resolve an issue, it is best done with kindness, and by showing some measure of respect. You get furthur with sugar (a nice kool aid perhaps) then with vinager. Nothing wrong with people voicing emotion. A tone of contempt or condescension may not be the best way to work together to address concerns, though it does get stuff on the table.
No brownie for you yet, but I believe that you can (if you so choose) work this out. The reward is worth it. Those brownies are yummy and have been known to lift peoples spirit, then some.
Perhaps it's me. Trying to resolve differences between people can lead to trouble. Though if DM & U both get pissed off enough at me 4 telling u to strech out an olive branch, u can find some common ground. Lets get it to where it all cool in the car (or in this case bus) pool. Is there such a thing as a bus pool?